By Carl “J.C.” Pantejo, Copyright February 2008

(Author “My Friend Yu – The Prosperity Mentor,” Copyright August 2007. Pantejo – Y.N. Vurce Publishing.)

“Prosperity: The eternal flow of all that’s good in life…”

*Below is the thirteenth episode in a series of real life events skilled by the author. The only deviations from the truth may be the names of individuals and places. These stories are also incorporated in “My Friend Yu – the Prosperity Mentor: Book II,” Pantejo – Y.N. Vurce Publishing. Release Date: 2008.

“Compatibility” is the degree in which you and your partner are comparable in temperament, nicely-suited for each and every other, well-matched, like-minded, and so on.

Because we need to first know what we actually want before we can gauge compatibility, we began the process of identifying personal requirements and desires.

We brainstormed.

We employed unbridled imagination to come up with Your List.

We continue the procedure in this post with the following actions: Prioritizing the items on Your List, Ranking, Pruning, and Reality Checks.

(Brief Aside)

My Friends:

You may possibly have noticed that, lately, my articles have been smaller in size.

Reason?

Several readers have commented that, even though my articles are enjoyable, informative, and absorbing, they tend to be much longer (over 2,000 words) than the usual articles (800-1000 words). Consequently, numerous readers merely do not have the time to read them in 1 sitting – the aim of all excellent articles.

So, in a rare instance of acquiescence, I am submitting a series of medium-sized articles aimed at those who believe smaller articles are a lot more palatable.

Do not worry. The size of the write-up will not restrict the quantity of content published.

I will just write much more articles!

- About this article -

I acknowledge the fact that Western/Asian relationships don’t constantly consist of a Western Man and an Asian Woman. There are several Western Woman/Asian Man relationships, as well as Man/Man and Woman/Woman couples out there.

But, because the overwhelming majority of Western/Asian couples are composed of a Western Man and an Asian Woman, this article addresses their issues and assumes that they are the main audience for the info submitted below.

- Brief Recap -

In “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (11) …,” we discussed one of the two main factors why relationships fail: Miscommunication.

Then, in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (12) …,” we began discussing the second main reason for relationship failure: Incompatibility.

Remember, “Compatibility” is the degree in which you and your partner are comparable in temperament, properly-suited for each other, properly-matched, like-minded, etc.

Considering that we must 1st know what we actually want prior to we can gauge compatibility, we began the process of identifying individual wants and desires.

We Brainstormed.

We utilised unbridled imagination to come up with Your List.

We continue the method in this write-up with the following steps: Prioritizing the items on Your List, Ranking the items, Pruning Your List, and Interpretation.

- Prioritize: Vital or Important? -

Okay. Let’s charge on.

Look at Your List.

Some items will seem to jump off the page. Those items stand out as Vital (can’t live without having) items to you. These are the things you completely need from your partner.

Other items, even though not Crucial, are Critical nonetheless.

If an item is neither Essential nor Important, it most likely would not have created it on Your List in the first location.

But there ought to have been a reason why you listed it. Do not delete any items. Maintain all of them for now.

Just classify them as at least Essential.

- Rankings -

Beginning with the “V” items, rank each and every item against every other. Which “V” items are far more crucial than others. Rank (number) them in the order of significance to you (i.e., your biggest require or desire is #1, and so on).

Now look at the “I” (Essential items).

Of the “I” items, which items are much more critical than the others? Number them accordingly – beginning with the next number of the last ranked “V” item. For example, if the last “V” item was ranked as #5, the initial “I” item should be ranked (numbered) #6.

Once again, we are not editing Your List yet. We are basically re-arranging the items to reflect their relative individual significance.

- Pruning: Reality Check No. 1 -

It’s time to start making Your List match reality – somewhat.

Look at Your List.

Are their any items that even Super Girl or Wonder Woman could not accomplish (e.g., that “Monthly 7-Day Sex Marathon” you listed as “V” item #1!)?

These varieties of items ought to be modified or deleted.

Maybe you could modify “V” item #1 to 18 hours?

Next, are there any items that are mutually exclusive? That is, do you have items on Your List that are so different, opposite, or rare that you would be tough pressed to get them from any 1 individual?

Type of like the tri-lingual, natural blonde, Asian you listed as “V” item #2, #3, and #4?

Decide which mutually exclusive, opposing item is a lot more crucial. Then scratch the lesser one.

I’d scratch “tri-lingual” and possibly “natural blonde” from the list. That would leave me with a realistic regular: “Asian”.

- Status of Your List -

If you’ve carried out all the actions outlined in this article so far, you really should now:

1.Have a list of your needs and wants (Your List).

2.Each and every item on Your List really should be classified as Vital (“V”) or Essential (“I’).

3.All items (beginning with the “V” items) need to be ranked (numbered) – in the order of significance to you – against each and every other.

4.Your List need to contain items that are humanly achievable.

5.Your List ought to be totally free of conflicting, mutually exclusive items.

- Reality Check No. 2: Does she? Can she? -

Look at Your List.

Does your partner (or prospective partner) give you what you want, specially the top-ranked “V” items? If so, fantastic.

Do your realistically believe this blissful state of affairs will continue? Once more, if so, great!

If not, why?

Maybe, presently, SHE CAN’T.

Ask your self plainly is she capable of giving me what I want?

Let’s say that you may possibly will need intellectual stimulation, but she in no way finished High School, doesn’t like to read, and is very averse to going back to school. Clearly, your want can not be filled by this certain woman.

What if you crave companionship, but you only see each other a couple hours a day since her and your function schedules conflict?

Or, what if you adore outdoor sports and activities, but she avoids sunlight (simply because she doesn’t want darker skin)?

Accept it. You two are basically not compatible in those areas.

And if an unfulfilled require is a really a “can’t live without” item, it’s finest to move on.

- Will she, will you? -

Look at the points you want, but are not acquiring.

Is your partner willing to discover how to fulfill your unmet desires? If not, you two will usually be incompatible.

Accept it. Move on.

If she is willing to learn how to meet your needs, are you willing to wait for her? If not, you two are incompatible.

Accept it. Move on.

- Reality Check No. three: Pluses and Minuses -

Assign a Plus (+) to the following items:

1.You are now getting it from your partner. You think that this is not a temporary thing (i.e., you believe you’ll get this need fulfilled or desire met for a long time).

2.You are not finding an item, BUT she is willing to discover how to give it to you AND you are willing to wait for her.

Assign a Minus (-) to the following items:

1.You are not acquiring it from your partner AND she is not capable to give it, nor is she willing to learn.

2.You are not getting it from your partner she is willing to understand how to give it to you, BUT you are not willing to wait for her.

In the next write-up, we continue the procedure with: Weighing the Pluses and Minuses.

(Continued in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’(14) – Farang: Tipping the Scale. Excellent or Bad?”)

“Until next time, discover ‘The Flow’ and jump in!”

Your Friend in this Intrepid Journey referred to as Life,

Carl “J.C.” Pantejo

Farang, Asia, relationship, compatibility, prioritize vital, critical, ranking, reality, capable, incapable, willing, unwilling.

Note: If you want to read much more about Asian and Western cultural differences, finding unconditional love, exorcising past individual demons, and the Illusive Secret of Happiness, please read the following articles:

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’: From Heartbreak to Happiness”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (2): Coincidence or Synchronicity: FROM RELAPSE TO MIRACLES…”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (three): LOST AND Found – Kindred Spirits and Errors produced in Haste.”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (four): LOST AND Found – Meant to Be?”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (five): “The Stray”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (6): “New Beginnings, Old Endings”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (7) – Living Properly? Farangs and Finance: The Myth”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (8) Living Well? Farangs and Finance: The Reality, Stupidity, and Challenging Knocks.”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (9): New Girlfriend, New Life.”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (10): Farangs and Asians – Polarized Views.”

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (11) – Farangs: In (or considering) a long-term Western/Asian Relationship? Read This Now!

“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (12) – Farang: Square Peg, Round Hole? Compatibility Problems.”

“How Dare She! Out of Desperation I Learned How to Forgive”

“Remember Who You Are!”

“Need to Heal Your Broken Heart? Read on. Overcome Heartbreak and Find out the Illusive Secret of Happiness.”

(By Carl “J.C.” Pantejo and published web-wide, keyword: [title of write-up] or “Carl Pantejo”)

Pantejo@ynvurcepublishing.com

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